This is difficult as Tnaesha is my wife, so after writing this I will go home and have to see her. Cringe for me and cringe for her possibly, but in the words of Kanye West, ‘people never get the flowers while they can still smell them.’
When I met Tnaesha, she was a very different person to who she is now. She worked in a school as a T.A. and was respected for what she did but seemed largely overlooked. A friend and colleague in her department, valued what she did greatly and taught her how to be an excellent teacher.
I met her fully on a night out about two years ago and spent a majority of the evening trying to woo her, to no avail. At an after party in my flat, I tried to work my charms but she wouldn’t have any of it. Instead she tried to set me up with her best friend, because that’s what she does, thinks of others (or maybe she was thinking of herself!)
I woke up the next morning to an accidental phone call from her at 3am. I texted her and told her, to which she replied, ‘I’m an alcoholic who rings people :)’ I found her brazen attitude endearing and took her out on a date. She told me that despite having had a long-term boyfriend, no-one had taken her on a date before. She had to pick my jaw up off the floor.
After that date, Tnaesha and I got on well. She could often be found in my flat, watching Game of Thrones, doing my D.I.Y. and more than likely eating my cheese. It was not a problem for me and her, but it did become a problem for other people who were close to her.
You don’t choose who you fall in love with and a reasonable human being who has loved, lost and loved again would forgive two young people for getting caught up in a whirlwind. Others didn’t. Tnaesha and I in the ensuing year, dealt with a great deal of unpleasantness and acrimony that will be documented fully and with no holds barred, a little further down the line. It is safe to say that I have never seen such horrible, self-serving behaviour in my life and I’ve seen a lot. She handled her life being turned upside down with grace, kindness and humility.
We were both hurt more than I can say and due to that we are very, very protective of one another.
As such, there were choppy waters and difficult times, but what remained was our love. We never doubted our relationship and probably never will. As they say, ‘haters gon’ hate.’ Jealousy is a motherflipper.
Tnaesha and I are now happily married and we are about to have our first child. She has completely reinvented herself; a brilliant wife and an excellent mother. She has a good group of friends who care very much for her. She stands on her own two feet and does the right thing, morally and ethically, no matter what the consequence is. She does this with humility and grace at all times. I mean, behind closed doors sometimes the grace slips a wee bit… but those conversations are between us!
She dotes on me for which I am eternally grateful and I truly admire the strength and courage she has shown in the past year. She is the queen of everything.